Two Can Play THIS Game !

My friend Warm Fuzzy (fellow blogger) posted a list of reasons for friends to remain living in St. Louis, rather than move away. I think she's bitter since two of her friends moved to Phoenix this summer. Ah ha, Fuzzy dear, here's my list:

The List of Reasons to Live in Phoenix

1. Kickass lightning displays!! Complete with purple skies! Big tall mountains.
2. My mother is faaaar away! Try 2343 miles! Dad is closer :)
3. The Mexican food here kicks all ass! No one thinks twice about eating a taco for breakfast.
4. I can drive to Disneyland in about five hours!
5. The Phoenix Zoo is voted one of the nation's Top Five Zoos for Kids!
6. The theatre down the street is a bargain. A ticket, large drink and small popcorn are $3 on Tuesdays or $4 any other day.
7. Citrus fruits are cheap cheap cheap! Peaches and nectarines were on sale 2 lbs for a buck!
8. DOGPARKS!! LOTS OF DOGPARKS!!
9. No snow or ice! Woohoo! Save money on your wardrobe.
10. Lots of pools - many are open year round! I love swimming. Its the part about people seeing me IN the swimsuit that bothers me :)

The List of Phoenix Things I Could Do Without:

1. Smog and dust storms.
2. Traffic (rush hour starts at 2pm and ends at 7pm)
3. Coyotes (my poor dogs), rattlesnakes, scorpions, black widow spiders
4. Illegals. Why hire me when Rosita will watch your children for half the price?
5. Cost of living
6. Forest Fires (I hate watching people's houses burn down on live TV)
7. More pools = more pool injuries and deaths :(
8. Sun so hot it feels like it is burning holes in my skin! Arizona has one of the highest skin cancer rates in the US
9. No sewers! Where does the rain go during monsoon season? It floods! Every rainstorm there's always at least one moron that tries to drive through the floodwaters and has to be rescued, putting the lives of the rescuers in jeopardy to save their dumb ass.
10. Lack of appropriately paying jobs (see above, #4)